February 14, 2006

Expatriation Coaching - What does that mean?

One of the topics that I am fascinated with is the cross-cultural adjustment process. As an Austrian immigrant in Canada I know that even a move from a Western European country like Austria to a modern developed nation such as Canada can entail a significant adjustment process. My acculturation phase took me about 4 years, and I had quite some bumps in the road getting adjusted to my new home country.

There is a whole continuum of cross-cultural experiences, from being a tourist in an all- inclusive resort with little exposure to the local culture, to becoming a "traveller" - a person who actually takes an interest in the foreign culture and explores it, to immersing yourself for a limited time in the local culture through language study travel, voluntourism, or foreign work or study assignments.

The most extreme cross-cultural encounters are created when one decides to leave one's home culture behind to relocate full-time to another country. That's when issues of culture clash and adjustment become most predominant.

Over the last few weeks I have been doing a search on the Internet for experts who are familiar with this type of topic to provide some insight into the process of relocation and acculturation in a foreign country. I found David Rhodes, owner of "I want to change my life", who is an "expatriation coach", literally an individual who helps people who want to pull up their stakes and move full-time to another culture.

Here are his insights:

1. Please tell us about yourself and your background.

I’m British, aged 43, and have lived in the UK all my life. My career background is varied, being self-employed since 1991 running a number of businesses. I became an accredited life coach with the UK College of Life Coaching in 2004.

2. How did you become an expert on expatriation and migration? What is "expatriation coaching" and what does it entail?

People sometimes question how, if I have never emigrated myself, how I am qualified to help them. There is plenty of “how to” books on the market on relocating, however the advice given is based on what was right for the author.

To be able to coach someone, you don’t actually need to know anything about the subject you are coaching about. Coaching is basically helping the client reach a decision that is best for them, and it’s a very specialised skill.

Rather than say I am an expert in expatriation, as this can be misleading I would say that I specialise in the area of helping people decide whether emigrating is the right thing for them and then help them plan and execute their plans to maximise their chance of success.

But I have an understanding regarding the important issues around relocating.

I do this via telephone conversations using my own unique and bespoke programs as a guideline.

3. Who are some of the people that come to you for advice and why? What makes emigration an attractive option to some people?

I would say that the vast majority of people who contact me don’t really understand what I do. So I get enquiries that would be better aimed at migration specialists about whether they would be eligible to migrate to a particular country.

My services are based around the premise to investigate not whether they legally can emigrate, but whether this decision would improve their lives.

Emigration is attractive to people because they think that they will improve their lives, they are unhappy where they are so they think that moving countries will solve that. It won’t necessarily, explained further under the “wheel of life” question.

4. Please comment on some of the favourite places that are commonly considered destinations for emigration.

There are the main countries, Australia, USA, New Zealand, South Africa, Spain, and Canada. And of course for people not living in the UK, Britain itself.

Generally however people have a dream about living in a hotter climate.

5. Please give us some practical examples of some of the stories of emigration and expatriate living that you have witnessed.

Angela is 35, she moved from New Zealand to the UK on a relatives visa, her grandmother was British. After initially moving to London, which by far the vast majority of migrants to the UK do, she wanted a better quality lifestyle. (London is not right for everyone). So she moved to Somerset where she is currently living with her 2-year-old son, who was born in this country. She is now totally settled, and when the opportunity arose to return to New Zealand as a result of a relationship breakdown she decided to stay and build another life in the UK.

On the other side there are numerous examples of British people who move to the Costa deal Sol, Spain, buy a not very profitable business, usually a bar, lose money and end up returning to the UK ruined financially.

6. What are some of the key factors involved in deciding on whether to emigrate? What are the potential benefits, what are the risks?

Whether you would have enough money in a new life is a key factor, especially if you have to establish a business or get a job. Being able to speak the language is central. Making new friends quickly is very important, as is the decision as to whether you would miss your family and current friends.

In fact if you look at the wheel of life each of these sections are key factors, for most people.

7. Please comment on the process of adjustment to a new life and on reaching one's settlement goals.

During the first few weeks in a new country most individuals are fascinated by the new. They stay in hotels and associate with nationals who speak their language and are polite and gracious to foreigners. This honeymoon stage may last from a few days or weeks to six months depending on circumstances.

Perhaps then you might encounter culture shock, and become hostile to your new country.

In the final stage of adjustment you will accept the customs of the country as just another way of living. You can operate without a feeling of anxiety although there are moments of strain. Only with a complete grasp of all the cues of social intercourse will this strain disappear.

For a long time you will understand what the national is saying, but you are not always sure what the national means. With a complete adjustment you not only accept the foods, drinks, habits, and customs but also actually begin to enjoy them.

When you go back “home” you may even take things back with you and if you leave for good you generally miss the country and the people to whom you have become accustomed.

8. In your coaching program you use an exercise called the "Wheel of Life". Please tell us more about that.

The wheel of life is a tool used by a lot of life coaches; it shows on paper how happy the client is with each aspect of their life, their Career, Friends and Family, Fun, Health, Finances and Relationships. By scoring from 1-10 each aspect of their life they can see on paper what aspect of their life they need to work on to make them have a more fulfilling life.

You tend to find that clients who want to emigrate will grade themselves low in most sections, but when you ask them what the wheel will look like when they emigrate they grade themselves much higher.

However, a lot of people who emigrate without fully investigating their move first, find that there is a reality gap, and that they did not for example realise how important Friends and Family were to them before they left. Or their job or business didn’t turn out to be as great as they thought.

9. Please comment on some of the practical issues involved in emigrating, e.g. jobs, housing, schooling, legal and insurance matters, etc, and how to deal with them.

I’m not really qualified to comment on these factors apart from the fact that I ask the client to consider these aspects and where they would obtain the answers to them.

10. Please comment on some of the psychological factors involved in emigrating, e.g. culture shock, language and cultural hurdles, isolation from loved ones, etc and how to deal with them.

Culture shock is caused by the anxiety that results from losing all familiar signs that you have been previously been used to seeing.
Perhaps the “rules” in a country such as Tibet can be seen to be different. But what you may not understand is that other countries that seem the same, such as Australia or New Zealand do have completely different rules.

When you emigrate you enter a strange culture, where some or all of the familiar cues are removed. You may therefore feel like a fish out of water. A feeling of frustration and anxiety follows this. People react to the frustration in much the same way. First they reject the environment that caused the discomfort: "the ways of the country are bad because they make us feel bad”.

Another phase of culture shock is regression. “Home” suddenly assumes a great importance, everything becomes glorified, all previous difficulties and problems are forgotten and only the good things back home are remembered. It usually takes a trip home to bring you back to reality.

You can suffer culture shock in your own country from having to associate with different people from differing backgrounds, multiply that feeling and you might have an understanding of feelings of culture shock whilst abroad.

11. Please comment on some of the common mistakes people make when emigrating.

People basically are blinkered; think that just by moving then their life will be better. Furthermore they do not seek help, mainly because they don’t want to think that their dream is in fact not right for them. So they take a leap of faith.

Provided that people are aware of the potential pitfalls, and are able to plan and accept that everything will not always be hunky dory then they are more likely to be successful.

12. What are some of the key factors involved in "creating a life you love"?

The basic key factor is to create a life for yourself that is in line with your values. For example, if you value freedom and create a life for yourself so that the freedom you crave is absent then you will not be happy. On the other hand if security is a value you treasure then moving abroad without a plan will also make you unhappy.

You must also have goals, regardless of whether you intend to emigrate or not. Goals lead to personal satisfaction when you achieve them, and also provide a marker to indicate that your life is improving and you are closer to creating a life you love.

Thank you, David, for sharing your knowledge on the topic of expatration coaching and the critical decision as to whether to move abroad or stay put.