September 13, 2005
Beans Around the World
By Scott Paul Rains,
Travel and Disability Editor
Comin’ into Los Angeleez.
Bringin’ in a couple a’ beans.
Don’t touch my bag if you please, Mr. Customs Man.
- Comin’ Into Los Angeles (Remix)
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Travel writers read other travel writers – and compare themselves.
It’s an occupational hazard
I once read how a travel writer dealt with the long loneliness
of life from a suitcase. He adopted a cockroach as a pet –
kept it in a matchbox and got it through customs every time. He
fed it, well, come to think of it, I stopped reading his article
before he got to that part. Guess I’m a little squeamish.
A can of beans is my clandestine carry-on. Not just any beans.
They have to be black beans (“frijoles negros”) from
Albertson’s supermarket. You see, I am a “Beans Ambassador”
for Beans Around the World.
Scott Rains & beans in Bratislava
The story of Beans Around the World is one of those fascinating
practical-jokes-between-friends-that-got-way-out-of-control and
went global. Very briefly, two friends kept passing some leftover
black beans back and forth until they got, let’s just say
“until they got especially attractive to cockroaches and their
kin” and we’ll leave the descriptive prose to your imagination.
At that point, canned beans became the medium of exchange and, before
long, the entire office was borrowing the can to take photos of
it in front of tourist icons around the world.
My contribution to the Beans Around the World photo gallery includes
such classics as a Slovak rendition of “American Gothic”
with the beans posing alongside distant relatives in Orava, Slovakia
in front of their log cabin home constructed in 1864. Another tribute
to my photographic talent and untutored production values is something
I call “Amalie Meets the Beans in Japan” where a garden
gnome, vaguely reminiscent of the one in the quirky film “Amalie,”
poses with the Beans.
You may wonder how the travels of a can of beans made their way
into a column entitled "Travel & Disability." The
connection is straightforward. If I can take a picture of the beans
somewhere then that location is, by definition, wheelchair “achievable.”
I hesitate to say “accessible” because I recall that
tracking down some Tasmanian Devils and Wombats in Tassie and negotiating
certain paths through the land of the Bunun Tribe in Taiwan made
me think that I might be ready to imitate Jesse Owen’s feat
of scaling Mount Kilimanjaro in a wheelchair.
If ever you want to spice up your travels with a bit of uncommon
adventure or you need diplomatic immunity and your credentials don't
qualify you for a recess appointment by a vacationing president
of the United States, become a Beans Ambassador.
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The beans in Aptos
Note to the Customs Agent standing just outside the door as I write
this article:
Dear Sir,
I forgot to tell the Agricultural Inspection Agent someting important.
Turn the can of beans that you confiscated from me upside down.
You will see that it is empty - no illegal foodstuffs have crossed
the border in my luggage.
OK, can I come out now? This little room you have me in is getting
a claustrophobic and the loudspeaker here at LAX just announced
that my connecting flight is leaving soon.
Besides, that Kafkaesque man in the corner-–the guy with
the Lone Ranger smile--has been has been crooning into a matchbox
ever since we got here and now he's shoving little bits of stale
baloney sandwiches into it. Says he’s a travel writer. I swear,
I’ve never seen him before….
Links to further reading can be found on this page: http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/travel_with_disabilities/117520
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Beans Around the World: A
can of beans was Scott's travel companion
Scott Rains is the publisher of www.rollingrains.com,
a useful website with valuable tips and information for disabled
travellers.
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